kids

not sure where to start with this little tale... hang on yes I know, A few weeks ago mum and I went to the airport to drop my sister off, the airport was kinda busy so mum wheeled me to far end so she could sit and wait and I'd be out of the way.Just as we were getting sorted a little kid maybe about 3 or 4 came up to me and asked why was I in the wheelchair? kids are inquisitive at that young age  so I didn't mind I told him I couldn't walk, he asked why  so I was trying to think of a simple answer, he did want all the technical info and I don't know it either lol so I told him my brain was broken and I can't use that side of my body so why can't you walk? I can't feel anything down that side as I pointed to my leg with a splint on, those answers seemed to please his enquiring mind so I thought that was it he will take off now, then out the corner of my eye I noticed my left leg moving, The little shit was kicking my leg!!! I guess he was just checking that I wasn't making it up, I t I a thought it was  What did annoyed me most was his mum watching and smiling as her son kicked the disabled person I told him that its not very nice to do that so he took off to his mum and then started running up and down on the chairs and the mother did nothing, omg I didn't know who I wanted to tell off more the mum or the the kid!!!my blood is boiling just thinking about it, I don't want to judge a parent but I did with this one,apparently my death stare isn't scary enough to  make her jump into action her parenting license needs to be taken off her and she needs to be sent to a class to learn what acceptable behaviour is in public,if she can't cope with controlling that child then, I better stop now or I will get myself into trouble Thats me and my moan done hmm I wonder what I will write about next time???

poo

warning, hospital and toilet talk coming up!! where to start?? going from never going to a doctor and never ever going to hospital actually  not going to a doctor probably helped get me into this stink situation i'm in!! I Haven't even broken a bone!! thats because you can't really get hurt when watching tv anywho having nothing to do with hospitals I made up for that by spending close to 1 year staying hospital 6 months of that was in the old peoples ward lucky the staff were awesome because it was pretty boring in there being in hospital I was exposed to a  number of different things, I have never been critiqued  as much as  I was in hospital, I know it was all for my well being it's just some of it was a little funny, there was the liquid in liquid out monitoring then there was a nurse who must have been getting close to the end of her shift and hadn't completed my paperwork for handover, so one day she came flying up to me, yes she did have a broom stick!! lol so she comes to me and in front my visitors and in the lounge with other patients watching tv she asks me if i've had a bowel movement!!! wtf me-very quietly with a red face, yes i had her- what was it like? me- even redder than before and  in my head, it was brown and smelly lol I believe there is a scoring system to monitor whats coming out lol so even your poo gets a mark omg luckily laxativesKiwi crush(a kiwifruit smoothie drink used to keep you regular it was also optional but i liked the taste so had it whenever I could  luckily the lzatives  were optional... but one day my poo must have got a bad score so the nurse insisted I have a laxative , omg I can't believe I'm sharing this but its one of those things looking back on  I can see the funny side of it!! so I had this bloody laxative and then some friends were visiting and they had brought in some nice fresh strawberries, my favourite so I smashed a punnet of them, yum!! then it happened the laxative and the strawberries worked at the same time, I was sitting in my room pushing the call bell thing hoping like hell help was on the way quickly because there could have been a code brown to clean up lol in which case I may have been wheeled outside and hosed down lol which I would have been ok with luckily someone showed up in time the moral of that story don't eat lovely fresh fruit and take a laxative at the same time lol  I think that gave me a passmark because I wasn't offered anymore laxatives lol To be continued... yes there is more lol

apologies

hello again, this one big apology for all of the mistakes with spelling and grammar in my posts, and sorry if the are a bit messed up. I try to proof read them but I still get things out of order and I miss parts of the storythats thanks to the cognitive problems I now have. its kind of like I have a million thoughts going round and round in my head then I throw them at the computer or old school I'd throw them at the paper what sticks stays and toobad if the ideas don't flow or make sense in my head it reads like a perfect novel oh yeah don't give me anything with dates, times or numbers, in general I can't sort them out without getting help from Mum
P.S I have no idea where this goes when I click publish
lol

Where have you been?

Howdy Just over 3 years ago some of you started following my journey from being an expert couch potato to being a buff super fit unrecognisable potato!!Thank you for signing up way back when running around outside was normal (but not enjoyable!!)
hmmm, I fell off the wagon just over 3 years ago actually I didn't fall off the wagon I fell out of bed and for a couple of days lay on the floor listening to the telephone ringing after that ordeal I didn't feel like getting fit So in case you didn't know I had a huge stroke which has left me with limited use of my left side, so limited I'm in a wheelchair now.. not even the good car parking is worth this!!and thats because the mobility car parking isn't very good, thats a completely different story, so I think i have a pretty good reason for not going to the gym or walking up and down a mountain like a balloon about to pop!!  I could go on forever about how shitty life has become but who wants read all that negative crap?? lol I haven't totally given up on the gym  i have joined a mobility gym in Mount Maunganui its awesome fully set up for disabled people, I think  the only part of me getting a good work out is my jaw!! I talk too much!! and thinking back when I went to a normal gym all the rugby players did was lean on a machine and talk they seemed to get fit so I was trying that approach to working out... Fail!! they must be doing secret gym sessions! lol When I was working, my dream job was to watch tv all day, now that I can do that...the dream is over, its no longer fun can you believe I get bored watching tv thank god for netflix but still nothing is holding my interest lol So this ever expanding potato is still watching tv when I can find something decent to watch I no longer watch tv from the couch I watch  from an uncomfortable  wheelchair or from bed I guess that means technically my mission has been accomplished, I'm off the couch, way back in the beginning of this blog I said I wanted shake off the excess flavouring/ fat in, that department I have failed one of my only joys  I have now is coffee and food, so Im coating myself in plenty of flavouring!!it's hard to work it off when you have limited movement you maybe thinking coffee isn't that bad well what goes well with coffee??? cake lol and I jump at any chance of a coffee date, to get out of the house, just so long as it fits in with all my medical appointments and the days my support worker is with me since having this stroke I've had 6 operations on my brain yippee or no!! so many other complications comes when your brain is messed around with  Thats me done for   today, I got to keep some stories up my sleeve for future posts Thank  you for reading thats assuming you have made it this far!! lolCatch ya'll later hopefully the next post will have some humorous stories, yes somethings can be funny even when you get dealt a shitty hand!!

ill have another go!!

kia ora this my 4th attempt at writing this story I have been struggling to condense the last 3 and a bit years into a short concise story not sure if i've done that in the following words I guess I should start where I left off, I had been  walking up and down mount Maunganui frequently to raise money for surf life saving and to get me out of going to the gym but still keep up with the mission  I had begun!! I must have been getting too much fresh air that's when
i  when I was able to. breathe this uphill walking thing is designed to  destroy your heart and lungs, apparently 2 really important parts of the body you need to walk or roll back down the mountain, well this what i've been told and when i checked  who am I to disagree with doctor google??  Anyway I had this crazy idea that I needed to change my job from one sitting behind a desk to something more physical, dam it I got the first job I applied for so that challenge.Began really quickly, I ended up with a job in a warehouse picking and packing orders. about 3 hours into my first day I was ready to quittuff this physical stuff it's too hard I needed the safety of my desk, this running up down a warehouse picking orders was ok but  it was the emptying of th40 ft container that really killed me!! The warehouse was full of empty paint cans,even though they were empty, carrying stacks of them was hard work I was working with an older lady who was a machine, she  would do all this heavy work in the  warehouse then go and do a spin class! wtf that is some craziness right there when I  went home all I could do was collapse and  start planning my next meal!! lol hmmm, I wonder why I had to get physicalI didn’t quit I built s ramp  so I could get  wheelie thing over a step, much easier to use the wheelie thing, geez i'm always looking fQ'm always looking for the easy way out

this twas much easier and ffaster using the ramp anyway Isucked it up( that would be sucked up my lungs and heart  and went back  for a few more weeks of hell!! But dam it was good for converting this couch potato into aa  shoe string fry!! Lol I still have t  a long way to go however my. cardio fitness was increasing and my arm muscles were building up!! A nice side affect of lifting more than a pen!! The only time I was behind a desk was the courses I did, I had to get. forklift driving  license, nailed it!! The other  course I did  was getting qualified to open a shipping container!! Wtf I thought some bolt cutters and a bit of brute strength  was all that would be needed, apparently there is a lot of checking paperwork and being prepared for any creepy. crawlies again wtf, don’t the containers  get fumagated and checked for snakes etc and fumigation is probably not a good idea imagine the news coverage If found it was a container full of refugees seeking asylum here!! when the container arrives in nz?? when opening a containerMy plan was to squash and spray anything that moved and if I came across a box of white powder, do you think I’d be telling the authorities?? Hell no that box would be my way to  stop work and it would kickstart my retirement plan r I wouldn’t go and buy flashy things, that might draw attention to me however would  set myself up as the kingpin of the nz drug world! I'm so tough!! lol I’ve watched enough movies and documentaries to know how to establish. Myself!! Haha, Unfortunately I didn't to try out this new career the magic box didn't arrive before Finished that  job I left not because I was sick and tired of physical work.  i left because my nightmare started, I had a massive stroke, so a pretty good reason for giving up on anything work related!! hello couch/ wheelchair! I'm back!!lol and just for shits and giggles I had my stroke during the night and managed to fall on the floor where I lay for 2 days before I was found oh how dramatic of me!! sounds worse than what it was I had no idea how long I was on  the floor for, fyi don’t live by yourself,  if you do get  a medical  alarm thing so you can push the button when you find yourself in a situation and need someone to come save you from lying on the floor  I had the dog to keep me companyI think she did good, if you have a dog i would suggest training  your dog to. bring the phone or tv remote so if you can see tv an it will help pass the time and if your phone keeps ringing like mine was you will be able to answer and request help if You are on the floor I’m sure watching Tv will help  pass the time  And always leave food out for the dog you don’t want your lovely k9 to start looking at you like you are  a nice juicy steak!!my imagination works overtime now! lol But seriously dogs are good little companions I know this because after my first operation i was patting my imaginary dog while in recovery,  since that shitty night I've had  5 operations the surgeon knows my brain better than I do  I’m home now but I i'M paralysed down my left side and  need help with most things, However I can make tea and coffee and most importantly I can make bacon and eggs!lol all is good in the hood  if I. can still make bacon and eggs!! I can only do stuff from my wheelchair, I can stand and kinda shuffle around, but I can’t shuffle around in the kitchen to make food I’m a boy and multi tasking isn’t a strong skill I have! Lol standing and holding something doesn’t work too well my  brain can’t cope with doing too many things at once even standing and talking can overload my brain,  and before anyone tries to be be funny, yes I do have a brain I have scans of it for proof the scan also shows the hole which is causing.causing my problems Somehow I need to build a bridge and tell the neutrons to get ver it!lol yes I got dealt a pretty shitty hand but it is what it is and I need to get on with life I can't  dwell on the situation I do get frustrated though not being able to do the things we take for granted like walking sitting and standing holding onto a coffee cup with both hands!! Why do some of those  cups have teeny tiny handles an adult can’t fit their fingers in, we aren’t all going to a teddy bears An aesome side effect of this stroke is epilepsy I had a shunt installed to reduce the pressure in my skull,  so now that  have epilepsy I’m too scared to be by self. I also can’t drive so I need a support worker to take me out I’m onto my third support person all of the coffee and lunches out  Must be a bit much or I'm a total prick to work with!! I need social interaction outside of homeI spend more time with mum than what dad does when he is in the country!! I'm lucky mum and I get along well together but we do need some time apart or we starting fighting  Mum  and it’s true when you hear people say you find out who your real friends are it's so true I’ve had amazing support from those friends who have hung around and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay my family they have been  amazing, having a serious illness  doesn't just effect the person it happened to  I’ve changed the course of my families there lives and thankfully they allow me to ask for things and they don’t make me feel stink I do that to myself for asking that’s hard to do with anyone, going from being totally I dependant to relying on others for everything, there are a few things I can still do or half do. toilet is all me except i need a hand to pull up the left side of my pants! showering is mostly me, washing is all good, drying not so good and dressing even worse so lots of help there it's  hard to deal with at times I’m not sure if I’ll be able to drive again I have left side  neglect so all sorts can happen to the left of me and I don’t notice which could be problematic driving, the left side of the car would constantly need a paint tI'm not sure if insurance would pay up frequently l on my left, geez I can. E a. Menace driving my power chair!! I ran into the reception lady at the hospital and I reunited into the dog a few times, oops with her deafness she doesn’t hear. Ycoming andshe doesn’t seeallthatwell, she is 13 not to bad for an old girl! lol oh yeah so a ktowhat I stRtedto sYa few people have stuck by me a lot of people have disappeared I’m not sure if it’s ecauseill. E a mess and unable tocommunicate, I did hear a visitor I had in hospital say oh

Looks like he did before, what were they expecting? I wasn’t mangled in a car crash and I heard a lot kfpeoplecomment on how well I could talk, oki get that one but for any good people visiting friends or fa ily just remember those curtains are not sound proof lol drs and nurses need to remember that to, I learnt all about the guy in the next ed I knew his ame birthday I’ll ess when he was duetoba e pipes and tubes changed I also learnt which nurse was learning to change and clean his stuff FYI. Ed baths aes nothing like the picture books and special videos would make them outto. Ed! Lol so if you need the down low on hospital stays just ask! Lol so yip a lot friends have dropped off the face of the earthor they all have their invisibility coats on lol a big thank you to those people who awe Dound, I don’t expect much I thought I may have got the Kc assional hello maybe they don’t know kw what to talk about with me like I am and the passing of. Y fVouriteand only little brother maybe these things created a perfect storm and have scared people away lol that’s just the first year i ebeen off this blog  I have plenty more I could say to filling the other 2 years but I won"t. thank you for reading this far!! must cuppa tea time lol I just thought of something ese I need to do. Ihave to change all of my inline fsting app description thongee yes there is more than 1 I am/ was desperate!! lol I need to chsnge  the I love long walks on the brach at sunset to I love beong pushed along the footpath closr to the beach at sundet so lng as I'm not  tired and Ialso love romantic dinners Ineed to change that to I love romantic dinners , you me and mum!! she has to take mr lol wow what a catch. qho wouldn't want all that ?? loland I haven't totally changed
i still spend a lot of time watching tv thank goodnrdd for netflix lol but that give me even more to watch lol and I'm still trying to turn into smaller oitato, not easy whrn movrmrnt is limitrd, so i have joined s mobility  apparently going there consistantly andeating healthy should have an affect and gwlp mw towards my goal.... dumb who qants that id rsther havr a magic pill lol 

To sing or not sing....

That is the question... Just one of the many questions running through my head!!

The home gym has been delivered and assembled.  Well I had to assemble it... that was a workout in itself !! So many bits and bobs to bolt together, the instructions came in seven different languages.... thank god one of them was English because the diagrams where a little hard to follow!!!  It kinda of reminded me of Ikea furniture only tougher!!!  Only took about three hours to assemble, needless to say after that effort I was in no mood for a workout, a movie was in order to relax!!

The new gear has been broken in and so far so good!!  I'm loving being at home and being able to do a work out, no need to use public bathrooms at the gym, you can choose what music you listen to, you can choose how loud to have it, you can wear the ugliest gym clothes without being judged, you can use the back lawn for extra room (watch out for the dog poo though!!) you don't have to wait for equipment, it doesn't matter if you short t-shirt rides up and you don't have to drive home afterwards!  So many advantages, why did I not think of this sooner???

However, being able to choose your own music can get a little tricky... you need an upbeat song that will get you pumping and keep the pace up while working out.  My problem is I keep choosing songs that I love to sing along too (another bonus of being at home, no one to complain about the singing!!!) but I think that impacts on breathing which in turn has something to do with the workout results so I need to learn to keep my mouth shut.... hmmm, just had a brainwave - Karaoke gym anyone??

I would also like to acknowledge my workout buddy.... Mum!! Two thumbs up for her hard out training tonight!!  Thought I was going to have to drag her out of the house to the shed but after some gentle persuasion we headed out for some torture!!  I think we had a good workout, turns out I may have learnt some stuff from Mark so I was able to coach Ma along a bit, (future personal trainer here... watch this space!!! bahahaha) we will need to tweak our routines a little but I think we are on track for a transformation... Geez we must have trained hard because we were both knackered by the end of it and pretty much had to crawl inside once we had finished.

As a reward for our hard work I was imagining a big piece of chocolate cake and a coffee (not forgetting the whipped cream!!).... ooohhhh, that would have been nice..... But reality hit once I got inside and on the menu was chicken and salad for dinner!!  It was no chocolate cake but it definitely tasted good, actually I was so hungry anything would have been good!! Ahhhh, The joys of healthy eating!!!!

Anyway, cardio night tomorrow..... wonder how we will go......

It's meeeeeee...... I'm back!!!!

Your a smart bunch so you have probably already realised that I fell off the wagon.... oops, my bad!!  I think I may have missed mentioning in my earlier blogs that I am the King of finding excuses to skip a training session or two or three weeks....  Of late I have used the excuse that Dad was home so I was busy with him, then a friend was over from Oz so I missed a session or two because of that, then working crazy hours got in the way, then I started a new job in a new town which came with a new set of problems and then during the other days I was just glued to the tv... no need to lie about that, we all know it's what I do best!!  But I will say when Dad was home although I wasn't going to the gym as often as I should have we did plenty of physical work at home which got a good sweat up and kept the weight from creeping up, which is a surprise because we didn't hold back when it came to food, if Dad felt like something e.g. fish & chips it was on the menu!!

As for most of the other excuses they were real but all I did was use them to justify to myself that it was ok not to show up at the gym, the problem is I accepted my own excuses without a blink of the eye which is where the downhill spiral started and then THUD.  The ground smacked me in the face and that's when realised I was sabotaging the good start I got off too.

However, I did start a new job unfortunately it is in another town to where my gym is based so I had to find a new place to sweat it out and show off my short t-shirts!!  I found a new gym in Rotorua and was keen as a jelly bean to get going and start my new routine 'going to the gym straight after work five days a week' and then home to relax.... hmmm, that nice little picture I had in my head of how my new life was going to roll was shattered when I went to gym to join up.  Turns out not all gyms are the same, I think I was spoiled with Bay Bodyfit and what they had to offer, a friendly relaxed atmosphere with clean and tidy facilities.  Turns out it is really important to feel comfortable in the gym you choose to use.   So I joined up on the Monday with a gym I wasn't 100% happy with and then called back on Tuesday to cancel my membership!!! Took me a night to realize I would end up finding more excuses to avoid going to a place I didn't feel comfortable in.   Now that left me in bit of a quandary...  what the hell am I going to do for a gym??? There was another I could join in town but it looked a little small and rough for my liking!!! And then a light bulb flashed above my head I have ended up joining an exclusive gym in Paengaroa... I know who would have thought there was gym out in that little settlement....  Well it's really new, it opened this week and it's out in our shed!!  We went equipment shopping last weekend and got a few of the basics, cross trainer, free weights, bench, bench press rack thingee (not sure of the technical name!!) and a swiss ball which according to theory should be enough to get us going until we need to expand our choice of equipment in the gym (and shed!!)  Oh yeah, sorry Dad you have just lost half of your shed!!!

There is no excuses now! No more, 'I don't have time to go into town for a workout' No more, 'bugger gym closes early today' No more, 'Oh shit, what do I wear today to the gym?'

So if you want to join an exclusive little gym (so far we only have 2 members, Mum and I!!) Feel free to pick up an application form.... pretty expensive though.... costs a lot to have a view of the paddock, the smell of the lawn mower in your work space and a cat and dog staring at you the whole time your working out!!! :-)

Everest has been conquered.... well, my version of Everest!!

Remember me?? Sorry, my bad!! I have been particularly slack over the last week or so doing my blog.  For a change I have been busy with.... um, actually I don't really know what I have been busy doing but come night time (the usual blog writing time) my brain is kaput and my fingers are incapable of typing!!! 

I finished my last blog saying I would talk about the insane High Intensity Interval Training (also know as H.I.I.T) this time.  Well.... I have done it a few times now, the first couple of times I could not complete the 12minutes of fast, slow, rest (repeated 3 or 4 times, I forget at the moment!!) At the end of 12minutes I would be hanging onto the cross trainer with fear of falling off flat on my face, my hands and arms were getting a workout just holding me up, who knows what was going on with my legs during that time, everything was a blur, I think my life even flashed before my eyes at one point!! Then after speaking with my evil trainer Mark, yip evil because he is making me do this!! I was saying that doing H.I.I.T at the end of my workout was not working for me.  I had no energy left after lifting weights so was only giving my cardio 40% of what I should have been doing.... So Mark suggested doing the cardio first.  Knock me down with a feather, why did I not think of that?  The solution was simple and it worked!!  The next time I tried it at the beginning of my workout and I managed to smash it out and finished my 12minutes (still holding on for dear life though!!), however when I finished I collapsed onto the closest machine and was out of breath for about 15minutes, and it took about 5hours to cool down after that!!

So to sum up H.I.I.T... it suxs!!! After lengthy discussions with Mark I decided an S needs to be added in front for 'Stupid'.  Unfortunately I don't think Mark will add the extra letter.... bummer!!  However Mark did deliver some good news which makes S.H.I.I.T not so... shit, after completing 12minutes of excruciating pain the body can continue to burn fat for up to 48hours!!! Awesome!!! 

Today I attempted to walk the Papamoa Hills again.... yes I'm a sucker for punishment!! I was expecting to just make it to the first seat again then do my little walk up and down from there.  Not this time... I made it to the summit!!!!!! YAY!!!! O.K, so I did stop at all the seats on the way up, even stopped at some nice grassy bits because the next sitting area was no where in sight!! Basically it was either stop and recover or keep going and literally have my chest explode open so my lungs and heart could have enough space to work at the same time!!  I think I may have to thank the S.H.I.I.T for getting me to the top today!! Shame about all the sheep poo you have to dodge though!!  Which makes me wonder how some of the people I saw wearing jandals today managed to a) keep the jandals on their feet (I'm thinking monkey toes) and b) how did they not get sheep poo smushed all over their feet?  Hmmm, the silly things you think about when sitting on the side of a hill people watching!!

I guess now that I have done that once I will have to keep going and try to work on the time it takes!!! I just wish there was a suggestion box for the Park Ranger at the bottom of the track.... they need to install one or to more seats, a couple of the distances between seats was a little extreme for a novice like me!!! And if they could put an ice-cream shop at the top, that would be awesome!!

Dam it's hot....

I can not believe the amount of sweat one person can make from working out!!! It's insane, I'm considering making a hat out of those Sham Wow's to try and contain the sweat, actually might try making a long t-shirt too!  Sorry, I know it's bit of a gross subject but it's part and parcel of the whole workout thing!!

The downside to all this sweating is having to replace all the water in your body.  I feel like I have a water bottle constantly attached to my lips, wouldn't be so bad if the bottle contained coffee or flavoured milk but it doesn't, just boring old water!  To be fair drinking the water while working out is easy, it's drinking it when I'm at home or work that is the hard part.  Trying to consume 3 litres of water a day is a mission and trying to do it before 4pm is a challenge.... I have found if I drink it after 4pm I end up spending the night getting in and out of bed going to the loo, be easier to set up a bed in the bathroom I think!! Hmmm wonder if a grown up nappy would work?? Scratch that thought, couldn't handle sleeping with a wet cold nappy on!!  Ahhh, the joys of trying to get in shape!!

Anyway, I have tried out the new program I was given the other day a couple of times now.  So far the weights part of it is good, I haven't dropped any on my head and I managed to keep the embarrassing puku flashing to a minimum.  Although I did lose control of the swiss ball today while doing my reverse curl crunches... the idea is to lie on your back and hold the swiss ball between your ankles, lift your legs into the air and do a crunch (I think I have explained that right!)  Anyway, because of the heat today my legs may have been a little sweaty so when I lifted the ball above me (with some force because I was in a hurry to get this painful exercise over and done with!!) I accidentally flung it across the room....  Luckily there was only one other person using that side of the gym to witness me chasing the swiss ball around like an idiot, could have been disastrous if there was a balance class on, I would have knocked them over like skittles!!

The cardio portion of the program is a whole new story though.... might save that one for the next update!!

Time to get back on the wagon.. S4CFVTVCJ59V

No more excuses now!!!  Everything at home has returned to normal so I can get back into the routine of regular work outs and healthy eating...

Had my first official meeting with Mark for the year yesterday to get my program for the next 3 weeks and check up on the damage done over the holiday period.  Found out something I already knew... I have no self control when there is holiday food in the house!!  I thought about bull shitting everyone and saying I maintained my weight loss from before Christmas then working my butt off to drop some weight fast however I realised Mark reads this blog and he knows the truth... my cover would be blown, dam it!!  So the truth is I managed pig out on just enough food and do the least amount of exercise possible to return me to my starting weight... oops!!  However that will not get me down, (although I did have a teary eyed moment when I looked down at the scales!!!) I have lost it before and I'll do it again!  This time I plan to lose it for more than a week though!!

We had a run through of the new program... it seemed to be ok... more intense than the last one I had but I reckon this is going to work a treat!  The cardio portion of the workout is.... um, how do I put it nicely.... insane??  Mark has me doing some high intensity interval training on the cross trainer which translated into layman's terms means going uber fast, then slow, then uber fast, then slow, then uber fast, then slow, I think you get the picture... and because Mark is soooo generous you only have to do that for 2 minutes the you get to cruise for a couple of minutes before going through that pain again!! To make it even more fun he wants me to hold onto the bars of the cross trainer (you know, so your arms going back and forth) because it burns more calories.... how about I eat less calories and not worry about the arms because I look like a spastic when I do it??  Did I say I only did the fast slow thing for a minute yesterday and nearly collapsed??  Not sure if Mark and I will be talking at the end of this 3 week stint!!

Purchased some new 'running' shoes today (which will be relabeled 'walking' shoes because I don't run!!)  What an exercise that is!!  They had one of those video thingees to see how you walk and what sort of shoe would be best, worked up a sweat just walking backwards and forwards with a bizillion different shoe types on!  But I'm all set now for the next 3 weeks of pain...

Oh in case you are wondering, the random letters and numbers (S4CFVTVCJ59V) in the title of this blog is so a blog directory can verify I am who I say I am... I didn't just have a dumb moment and leave a spelling mistake in the title!  Well not this time anyway!!

The first entry for 2012...

Thought it was time to get writing again.... I think today marked the final day of holiday slackness!!  All the family have left so it's time to get into a routine and get this journey back on track!  Well for a week anyway then I'm off to Wellington for a few days!!!  Where I will be walking the hills so kind of staying on track!

So I thought I would take advantage of all these sales on at the shops and I went on the hunt for some t-shirts to do my workouts in.  What a disaster!!  I was certain I would find a long t-shirt so I would have no more incidences of peek-a-boo puku (stomach)!!  Turns out the shops I went to where all out of long t-shirts, so I have had to make do with the regular length but I have a theory.... as the tractor tyre shrinks to lets say a bicycle tyre around my midsection, the t-shirts will be able to hang like they are designed to and my problem should be solved... make sense?? If I was clever on this computer I would draw a diagram!! So in the mean time, I apologise to all the other gym members who are unfortunate enough to catch a glimpse of some extra white meat!!!  I'll try to keep my workouts to the middle of the day when no one is about!!

I don't know how people manage to keep up their fitness regime during the holiday season but I am sooo easily distracted when it comes to going to the gym, exercising or eating during this time, just one twist of my rubber arm and I'm away!  I planned on going to the gym twice this week and twice I didn't go!  First time I was tempted away with lunch in town and a spot of shopping, the second time I ended up doing extra hours at work and couldn't be bothered to go because I was too hungry (managed to miss my breaks so had not eaten since breakfast), all I could think of was KFC so I raced home in fear of the car detouring (by itself of course!) into the nearest drive thru... it could have easily happened, I have to pass 3 KFC drive thru's on the way home and my car is unpredictable!!!

Today was another day I had considered going to the gym but it was the first fine day we have had in what feels like an eternity so I took advantage to head home and get some of the outside chores done.  Going to the gym would have been easier!!  The killer today was trimming the hedge.... who knew it was so hard to hold the hedge clipper machine thing in the air while trying to cut the hedge in a straight line!!  I have a new respect for Dad, he is a machine because he doesn't moan and complain anywhere near as much as I did!!  Even the dog looked at me strange as I collapsed onto the lawn wheezing and struggling to breathe!!  I think she thought I was about to cark it, hell I was thinking it!!  What a work out it was!! I have found muscles in my arms I never new existed!  Cutting my dinner tonight was a mission, even typing this blog is hard work!!  And do you know what the best part of all this is....... I only got half the hedge done!!!  I have to go through all of this pain again!! Arghhhhh!!!

Is the ham all gone yet?

When will this holiday season be done???  I had the best intentions to have a day or two off and then get back into the training to work off the excess turkey, ham and trifle.... I followed the portion control rules so I didn't over do it, shame I didn't stick to the five small meals a day I should have!!! Kind of lost count some days... Dam all the yummy food screaming out at me every time I walked past!  Next year I will try walking around the house with ear muffs on so I can't hear that food begging me to fulfill it's life journey and devour it!!  

Having my sisters at home also didn't help, who wants to go to the gym to work out when you can fully get into holiday mode and cruise with them??  Unfortunately I took that one step too far and forgot to go to work... Oops!!  (I did go in after a wake up call asking where I was....)  Speaking of work, the extra hours over Christmas completely messed me around with the Christmas gym hours.  I hear you say "why didn't you hit the hills again or do stuff at home??"  The honest answer to that is... I'm lazy and I was pretending to be on holiday!!

I had this mad idea that shopping with the sisters could be a good way to get in some walking during one of the many rainy days we have had... Yes, I did get some extra walking in I normally wouldn't have done but I got bored really quickly and ended up in a cafe drinking an iced coffee (with no cream!!) so not sure if I really achieved anything!!  

Mark my trusty trainer emailed me too, just to see how things were going.... I need to publicly apologise for the little fib I told him.... I did intend on going to the gym as I had told him in my reply email, it's just that something came up which I couldn't say no to.... it's not often one's sister offers to shout lunch!! 

Starting this little journey before the holiday season was a little bit stupid of me but I think what I really wanted was to get a feel for how things would go when I knuckle down in the New Year and start losing some serious weight!  I can say that I have that feeling now, I know what I'm in for in the New Year and if I'm honest I'm a little bit excited and scared all at the same time for what is coming!!! 

Have a great New Years and I'll check back in soon!!

P.S Don't tell them, but having both sisters around was pretty cool, and I have no regrets about spending time with them instead of slogging it out at the gym!!! (next year might be another story! lol)

My bad...

Ooops, I missed doing an update yesterday... and no I didn't miss my workout (even though my calf muscles were screaming at me to give it a miss!!!) I didn't get home until late last night by which time my fingers were too tired to type let alone have my brain string enough words together to make sense!!

But I did go to the gym and do an hours worth of cardio... dam it was hot!!!  And that is when the confusion began to set in!! I could go for half an hour non stop on the treadmill without a problem (well other than struggling to breathe and dripping with sweat!!) Yet when I attempt to walk outdoors I start dying and begin looking for a resting place after about 5minutes...  I think that dam treadmill has been luring me into a false sense  of security!!  The helpful staff at Bay Bodyfit helped clarify what was going on... I'll confess, sometimes I'm a little dumb and it never occurred to me that the dam treadmill kind of helps you along when walking!!  Apparently if you make sure the treadmill is on an incline of at least 2 then it will feel more like walking outside.  I'll try that next time but not sure if my calves will like me for it because an incline sounds like hard work!!

Today was another weights session at the gym... I think it went to plan...  I was in bit of a rush when leaving home and left my program on the table so had to do it all by memory, which could have been a disaster but thank goodness I have been taking those fish oil pills, they must doing wonders for my brain!!!  Made it through everything OK, up'd the weights on a few of the exercises which is awesome... gets me a little further away from the Nana weights I started with!!!

Not sure when the next update will be, got to get through the next few days with family and food around!  So will need to try and fit in some walking and hopefully the food police will be at home to keep an eye on what's going on my plate!!!

So, Merry Christmas!!! Enjoy the day and don't over indulge.... if you can help it!!!

And one last note, my thoughts go out to all those in Christchurch today.  Not the best timing for another earthquake...  Hope it all settles down for Christmas!!!  

Week 1 done & dusted!!!

Wahoooo!!! The first week is done and I'm still alive! Well, I think am... body is a bit sore, muscles are aching a little, feeling a bit tired (actually that could have been the late night TV watching!!) but I guess that is a sign of progress??

Went into the gym today for a little mid afternoon workout... Going in the afternoon is awesome, feels like my own private gym because all the other members are out working!! (I should be too but part time hours allows this kind of craziness!)  Not having to wait for equipment is great and not having to worry about too many eyes watching me is even better!  Especially as the curse of the short t-shirt reared its ugly head again today!  Nearly died of embarrassment as I sat up from doing my incline dumb bell flyes and there to great me was my puku staring back in the mirror!!!  Can't wait for that to shrink and the abs to appear.... dam I hope they appear!!!

Being exactly one week since my last meeting with Mark I was curious to see if any progress had been made.... I stepped onto the scales and waited and waited, the screen went blank, bugger I broke them!! Oh hang on a minute I can see some kind of flickering... I think the scales were in shock and doing some recalculations to be certain the number it was about to slam me with was the right number as it came back 2.4kgs less than last week!! WAHOOOOO!!!  Now I would love to share with you what the starting number was but it's still bit of a sore point at the moment!!  I'll reveal that number later... maybe about the time those 'before' photo's get released!!

This next week is going to be a hard one, Christmas is plonked in the middle of it, family are coming home to visit and I'm going to be surrounded by food.  I'm putting it out there now.... You can not keep me away from the Ham, Turkey & Trifle!!!!  I will try and eat responsibly but I can't promise anything....  Looks like I might be spending more time at the Papamoa Hills this week!

Anyway, of to pack my gym bag for tomorrow's torture session!!

The hills are alive with the sound of....

Heavy breathing!! Yip, today I decided to miss the gym and take the workout to the streets!  Well not really the streets more like the Papamoa Hills.  I thought it was going to be a fantastic idea, getting my walk on in the sunshine, breathing in the fresh air, being at one with nature.... um, I was mistaken!

I hadn't done this walk before so was not to sure what to expect.  Arriving in the car park I was greeted with a bank of stairs.  Hmmm, that can't be good... how am I meant to do a gentle walk to warm up before hitting some of the hilly bits?   So I took a swig of water and started the climb up the stairs, and then some more stairs, and then a couple more stairs before the track turned into a steep slope.  I wasn't sure if my lungs were going to explode or if my heart was going to bust out of my chest and then it happened.... I could see light at the end of tunnel.... Some awesome council people had installed a seat!!!  Needless to say, I hauled my ass onto it and tried to calm my breathing down while wiping the sweat out of my eyes and trying to look cool just in case anyway walked around the corner and saw me!

While sitting there I decided it might be best if i didn't continue walking up the hill, should I have a huge coronary getting me out of there would have been a mission and I didn't want to put those ambulance officers through the pain of dragging me down the side of a hill!!  Actually if I was conscious I would have told them to chuck me on the bed/gurney (not sure what its called!!) let the brake off and I'll meet them at the bottom!

Anyway, instead of slinking off home because it was all too hard I decided I would continue walking up and down to the seat until I could hack it no more.... only took just over half an hour before my legs started shaking I figured that was the time to head home.  I didn't think about the driving part though, have you tried to push the clutch in to change gears with a leg that is nearly uncontrollable?? I can confirm its not easy and the poor car was only seconds away from bunny hopping down the road!!

But that wasn't the end of physical activity for the day... the sun was out so I thought I would mow the lawns.... I'm sure your wondering what crazy thought process would lead to making such a dumb decision after walking myself into pain.... Well to be honest it was an easy decision, we have a ride on mower so I could sit back and relax!!!

Anyway, back to the gym tomorrow for some weight training...  ouch!!

Is that a spy???

Another day in the gym sweating it out... ok, it was only the 2nd official day but it feels like I have been going for months!  The sweating it out is right though, dam I was hot today, must have been the humidity because the sun wasn't out for long today!!

While I was doing my workout today I noticed one of the staff members from the gym doing her workout.  I know I have a slightly over active imagination at times but I couldn't help but wonder if staff members doing their own 'workouts' are planted their to keep an eye on people and report back to the trainers with what's been going down without them around....  Turns out they are just there getting/staying fit themselves, they are probably hoping we aren't watching them!  However I think I have to keep the 'spy' theory alive in my head because I noticed I tried a little harder when I thought I was being watched!!

Also watched some guy doing this crazy balancing act on these things which look like large blue M&M's but instead of being full of chocolate its full of air.  Anyway, he had one of these things under each foot then proceeded to do squats and lifting dumb bells above his head... I held my breath as I watched, he was concentrating hard trying to keep his balance, then I noticed a couple of others in the gym had stopped what they were doing to watch as well, I didn't feel so bad for staring then!!  I think we all had the same thought.... "this guy is going fall, it's going to be messy.... dam, where is my phone to video this?? I hear You Tube calling!!!" I'm sure it would have gone viral!!  But when he finished without falling off I felt that we needed to clap to celebrate his success... I didn't do it though, shamos!! And I felt a little let down because watching weights go flying through the air while he hit floor would have been entertaining!!  Of course I would hope he didn't get hurt though...  However this is a good example of why you should not be a show off and do this kind of craziness in front of people, hide in the quiet part of the gym so if it turns to custard no one will know!!!

Hmmm, speaking of custard must be dinner time... dam, no custard on the menu tonight, got to wait until Christmas for that!!

First day of pain...

Today I managed to put myself through some pain... I tried to delay the inevitable by talking to Mark & Lisa (owners of Bay Bodyfit) for as long as possible but the time came when I had to suck it up and start my workout.

It all seemed to go to plan, doing a few dynamic lunges, some hamstring curls, lat pull downs etc... look at me spouting of the names of exercises as if I know everything about them!!  I managed to remember everything Mark had told me yesterday which surprised me because I'm sure I glazed over a few times while he was talking yesterday wondering what the hell I was getting myself into!!

However, I did find out today that I have trouble counting and lifting weights at the same time. '1,2,3... was that 5 or 6? hmmm... 8,9,10, why is breathing so hard right now? 9,10,11... shit am i doing 12 or 15 reps? 10,11,12,13.... crap I think my legs are going to buckle... 15... that must be enough???'  So I think I did enough, maybe one or two extras every now and then or maybe I came up one or two short every now and then but I do know there is no way I could have done anymore!!

Also ran into bit of a problem today.... while doing my lateral raises I discovered a major flaw in clothing design... t-shirts are not long enough!! Its not cool to be standing in front of a mirror (to be honest it's never cool to look in a mirror!!) struggling to lift your arms up to shoulder height and then noticing a puku peeking out!!  Maybe I could get some velcro and attach some extensions to my t-shirts??

So that was pretty much my first session at the gym by myself.  I must have done something right because my muscles are sore already.  Need to find a crane to come around and get me out of this chair, my quads are killing me!!

Will update again soon....

First meeting with the trainer...

So, today was my first meeting with my Personal Trainer, Mark Woodgate from Body Blueprint.  I had a fair idea I knew what I was getting myself in for, just a casual meeting to go through what my new routine is going to look like...

Well, that's what I thought anyway.... after some chatting and discussion on what the plan of attack would be I was dragged (kicking and screaming) into the gym to be shown a few of the exercises, you know to make sure my posture was correct, the weights were right and the most import thing... that I was breathing!! Turns out I hold my breath while lifting weights, not the best idea I have come up with!! I knew I should have taken a change of clothes but ended up doing this in my work uniform... oops!

But I have to say I learnt a valuable lesson today...  If Mark asked if that weight was enough, always say yes and say it quickly.  If you pause to think about it or say no, he adds more weight, I noticed while he did that he had one of those grins on his face, I can't decide if it was a cheeky, friendly or evil grin but I'm sure he was thinking "Gotcha now sucker!! We are guna make those muscles burn!!"

I forgot to mention, because its one of those horrible things that one tries to forget, that I was put through the horrendous task of stepping onto the scales and getting measurements taken.  I was about to head off to the truck stop to use the big scales but Mark assured me the gym scales would handle the jandal... I gingerly stepped onto them and waited for the breaking sound which to my surprise didn't come, the only thing that happened was a rather large number showed up.... that number will be kept under wraps locked up in a safe until further down the track (along with the before photos!!)  Once I recovered from the shock of what that number was Mark pulled out some funny shaped tongs and started pinching me with them.  I hate those calliper things, the numbers that come from them about body fat are depressing!!  Then Mark measured my waist, chest, biceps (yip I have them!!) calves etc, is there no end to the pain???  Nope there isn't next up was my blood pressure not good but fingers crossed it will improve as time goes on.  After all this depressing news all I wanted to do was sit the corner curled up in a ball and rock, actually no I didn't, I wanted to go to KFC to recover!!  But I didn't!

So the plan in a nutshell is to ease into the gym routine over the next couple of weeks then in the new year it's on like donkey kong!!  No holding back, I'm on a mission!!!

I think that is enough for my first post on this blog thing!!

Catch ya next time :-)

P.S I need to put a disclaimer thingee somewhere on here... I'm not a trained writer, journalist or literary genius so I apologise in advance for all spelling and grammatical errors!!!

Hello world!