poo

warning, hospital and toilet talk coming up!! where to start?? going from never going to a doctor and never ever going to hospital actually  not going to a doctor probably helped get me into this stink situation i'm in!! I Haven't even broken a bone!! thats because you can't really get hurt when watching tv anywho having nothing to do with hospitals I made up for that by spending close to 1 year staying hospital 6 months of that was in the old peoples ward lucky the staff were awesome because it was pretty boring in there being in hospital I was exposed to a  number of different things, I have never been critiqued  as much as  I was in hospital, I know it was all for my well being it's just some of it was a little funny, there was the liquid in liquid out monitoring then there was a nurse who must have been getting close to the end of her shift and hadn't completed my paperwork for handover, so one day she came flying up to me, yes she did have a broom stick!! lol so she comes to me and in front my visitors and in the lounge with other patients watching tv she asks me if i've had a bowel movement!!! wtf me-very quietly with a red face, yes i had her- what was it like? me- even redder than before and  in my head, it was brown and smelly lol I believe there is a scoring system to monitor whats coming out lol so even your poo gets a mark omg luckily laxativesKiwi crush(a kiwifruit smoothie drink used to keep you regular it was also optional but i liked the taste so had it whenever I could  luckily the lzatives  were optional... but one day my poo must have got a bad score so the nurse insisted I have a laxative , omg I can't believe I'm sharing this but its one of those things looking back on  I can see the funny side of it!! so I had this bloody laxative and then some friends were visiting and they had brought in some nice fresh strawberries, my favourite so I smashed a punnet of them, yum!! then it happened the laxative and the strawberries worked at the same time, I was sitting in my room pushing the call bell thing hoping like hell help was on the way quickly because there could have been a code brown to clean up lol in which case I may have been wheeled outside and hosed down lol which I would have been ok with luckily someone showed up in time the moral of that story don't eat lovely fresh fruit and take a laxative at the same time lol  I think that gave me a passmark because I wasn't offered anymore laxatives lol To be continued... yes there is more lol

apologies

hello again, this one big apology for all of the mistakes with spelling and grammar in my posts, and sorry if the are a bit messed up. I try to proof read them but I still get things out of order and I miss parts of the storythats thanks to the cognitive problems I now have. its kind of like I have a million thoughts going round and round in my head then I throw them at the computer or old school I'd throw them at the paper what sticks stays and toobad if the ideas don't flow or make sense in my head it reads like a perfect novel oh yeah don't give me anything with dates, times or numbers, in general I can't sort them out without getting help from Mum
P.S I have no idea where this goes when I click publish
lol

Where have you been?

Howdy Just over 3 years ago some of you started following my journey from being an expert couch potato to being a buff super fit unrecognisable potato!!Thank you for signing up way back when running around outside was normal (but not enjoyable!!)
hmmm, I fell off the wagon just over 3 years ago actually I didn't fall off the wagon I fell out of bed and for a couple of days lay on the floor listening to the telephone ringing after that ordeal I didn't feel like getting fit So in case you didn't know I had a huge stroke which has left me with limited use of my left side, so limited I'm in a wheelchair now.. not even the good car parking is worth this!!and thats because the mobility car parking isn't very good, thats a completely different story, so I think i have a pretty good reason for not going to the gym or walking up and down a mountain like a balloon about to pop!!  I could go on forever about how shitty life has become but who wants read all that negative crap?? lol I haven't totally given up on the gym  i have joined a mobility gym in Mount Maunganui its awesome fully set up for disabled people, I think  the only part of me getting a good work out is my jaw!! I talk too much!! and thinking back when I went to a normal gym all the rugby players did was lean on a machine and talk they seemed to get fit so I was trying that approach to working out... Fail!! they must be doing secret gym sessions! lol When I was working, my dream job was to watch tv all day, now that I can do that...the dream is over, its no longer fun can you believe I get bored watching tv thank god for netflix but still nothing is holding my interest lol So this ever expanding potato is still watching tv when I can find something decent to watch I no longer watch tv from the couch I watch  from an uncomfortable  wheelchair or from bed I guess that means technically my mission has been accomplished, I'm off the couch, way back in the beginning of this blog I said I wanted shake off the excess flavouring/ fat in, that department I have failed one of my only joys  I have now is coffee and food, so Im coating myself in plenty of flavouring!!it's hard to work it off when you have limited movement you maybe thinking coffee isn't that bad well what goes well with coffee??? cake lol and I jump at any chance of a coffee date, to get out of the house, just so long as it fits in with all my medical appointments and the days my support worker is with me since having this stroke I've had 6 operations on my brain yippee or no!! so many other complications comes when your brain is messed around with  Thats me done for   today, I got to keep some stories up my sleeve for future posts Thank  you for reading thats assuming you have made it this far!! lolCatch ya'll later hopefully the next post will have some humorous stories, yes somethings can be funny even when you get dealt a shitty hand!!